Honest Thief

Honest Thief

Dept. of Tried and Tested and Taken

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So here’s the deal. Liam Neeson is a thief. Only, he’s not like other thieves. Sure, he steals things. Mainly from banks. You know all of that hard earned money that you’ve worked your whole life to save? He takes that and keeps it for himself. That is until he meets a woman and decides to give up his life of crime and come clean. His plan is to turn himself over to the FBI, return the nine million dollars that he’s stolen over the course of his career, and strike up some sort of deal. Which, I suppose, makes him “honest.” An honest thief?

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It’s a stretch, I know. But that was the only explanation I could come up for why this movie was called what it was called. I mean, Liam Neeson is a nice guy and all. He’s tall, and charming, and really good at his job – which so happens to be robbing banks – but I’m not sure turning yourself in because you suddenly found love makes you “honest” by any definition of the word.

I think maybe the filmmakers meant that he was an “Honourable Thief.” Which, now that I think about it, would have been a better title for this movie. (I clearly spent the majority of the running time of this movie thinking about its title.)

Honest Thief

Honest Thief is a wholly unremarkable and utterly forgettable movie. I just finished watching it 15 minutes ago and I can’t remember the protagonist’s name. I think it was Jim. Or John. Or something.

Anyway, Tim is deeply in love and goes to the FBI with an offer. He’ll return all the money that he’s stolen in exchange for a reduced sentence at a minimum security facility, after which, he can have a fresh start with the love of his life, (let’s call her) Alice. Or was it Amy?

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The FBI, who are understandably apprehensive about the phone call, send over two young agents to figure out if Tom – that’s right, his name is Tom! – is who he claims to be. They do. He is. And the two agents decide to steal his money and leave him for dead.

And then Taken happens.

Honest Thief

Director Mark Williams isn’t reinventing the genre with this movie. There isn’t very much that’s thrilling or even suspenseful. Everything just ticks along competently. The cat-and-mouse game between Tom and the FBI is zippy. The action is pleasant enough. There is a believable chemistry between Liam Neeson and Kate Walsh (It was Annie! Her character is called Annie!). And that’s about it.

Honest Thief is precisely the kind of filler content that would have perfectly padded the once lucrative direct-to-video market.

Honest Thief

Ever since the success of Taken back in 2008, this style of action thriller has become something of a staple on our screens. In it, our lone hero, or someone close to him/her, is wronged in some way, so he/she sets out to set things right. Usually using a lot of guns and employing a “very particular set of skills.” It’s become a genre unto itself (it’s this generation’s “Die Hard, but on a…”) and a fun(?) digression for otherwise high caliber dramatic actors.

The Equalizer was Taken, but with Denzel Washington. The Foreigner was Taken, but with Jackie Chan. And The Beast (La Belva) was Taken, but in Italian. The same goes for Ava (Jessica Chastain), or The Rhythm Section (Blake Lively), or 3 Days To Kill (Kevin Costner). You get the idea.

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I can’t tell you why these actors are drawn to making these sorts of movies. Especially when most of them are so painfully generic. I’m not sure why Liam Neeson makes at least one of these ever year. Maybe it’s the money. Maybe he really enjoys them. Or maybe it’s because this is the kind of thing that ends up being watched by the most people across the world. Not in cinemas mind you, but when it finally makes its way onto some streaming service. (The terribly mundane PeppermintTaken, but with Jennifer Gardner – was recently trending upwards on the Netflix charts, two years after no one watched it in cinemas.)

Liam Neeson is incredibly likeable. And he is always completely committed to the part, even in a movie as unsurprising as this one. He’s built up a solid reputation as a bankable action star and these roles, where he plays a manly man hellbent on doing the right thing, appeals to a demographic that’s looking for reliable no-brainers. Simple stories in which old-fashioned masculinity is a good thing and not a toxic thing.

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Honest Thief isn’t a good movie. It isn’t a bad movie. It’s just a movie. It’s just there. And a year from now, when you’re looking for something to watch on Netflix, you’ll come across the following blurb, “A professional bank robber, who is framed by two crooked FBI agents, must go on the run to clear his name and bring them to justice,” and think to yourself, “how bad could it be?”

Honest Thief
99 minutes
Director: Mark Williams
Writers: Steve Allrich and Mark Williams
Cast: Liam Neeson, Kate Walsh, Jai Courtney, Jeffrey Donovan, Anthony Ramos, and Robert Patrick

Honest Thief is now available on VOD.

Uma has been reviewing things for most of his life: movies, television shows, books, video games, his mum's cooking, Bahir's fashion sense. He is a firm believer that the answer to most questions can be found within the cinematic canon. In fact, most of what he knows about life he learned from Ace Ventura: Pet Detective. He still hasn't forgiven Christopher Nolan for the travesties that are Interstellar and The Dark Knight Rises.

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